The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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