you turned your livingroom into a bong?
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Randomize
