every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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