There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
nutella sex= disaster
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
I have post one night stand depression
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