I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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