Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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