yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Randomize
