Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
A+ Viking dick
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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