its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Randomize
