You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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