he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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