At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
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I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
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It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
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