whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
