I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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