some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
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