What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
