i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
soo... how was my night?
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