We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize