i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Randomize
