can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
