...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
