ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Randomize
