I haven't been this sober since birth.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Randomize
