I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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