I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
