She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
