Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Randomize