You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!