McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize