YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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