god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
These 19 People Had Awkward Celebrity Sex Dreams
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
These 27 People Had No Idea What They Were Doing When It Came To Sex
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.