Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.