there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
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