And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
