woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
