..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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