Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
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