Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
honey bunches of taint.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
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