IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I just blew my weed a kiss
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I would ride that face into the sunset
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
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