Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
