I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
