There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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