You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
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How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
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We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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