she was so not down for the gang bang
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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