Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
