Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
