So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Randomize