Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Randomize
