i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
