put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
