im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
