Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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